the Quotery 1.4.8 "You! Suck the poop." -- Surgery attending, telling me to suction the ileostomy, in the OR 4.17.7 "IBM is built like a brick. I feel like you could use it as self defense and beat someone with it if you needed to, then open it up and continue programming!" -- Alex 4.3.7 Emily: She needs a sedative! Kim: In a big way. I need a thorazine blowdart gun. Emily: Hahahahah... thank you for being funny! Kim: Well, we try... it's easy to be funny with all the voices in my head... someone is bound to be funny. 3.12.7 "I didn’t think a Queen size bed was that small. But clearly it’s too small for two people who beat each other in their sleep." -- Kim 3.3.7 Emily: dude, you know it is 56 degrees outside? FIFTY-SIX. Amy: yeah... it looks gorgeous Emily: do you wanna go out and like, I donno, feel at one with heaven and earth? Amy: is that another name for tennis? 1.11.7 Amy (upon seeing Steph shrunken into a frozen ball on the couch): Steph, you look like a rat that's scared Steph: Well geez... thanks. You look like a... beetle Em: Wow, my thighs and my butt hurt so much right now Steph: well you know I read in the New York Times Science the other day that when you gain a lot of weight in your thighs and your butt it begins to hurt... Em: Wha-- really? everyone enjoys a laugh at my expense "Did you tell your mom I groped your boob today?" -- Amy on physical diagnosis 1.8.7 Aaron: i just burped and puked in my mouth. now that is the worst taste ever Em: eeeeeeeeeew Aaron: yeah nothing beats the taste 'o stomach acid 1.5.7 "Wow, I wish I were gay. I would totally go for Aaron." -- Vin 8.4.6 "That's okay; we'll just outsource the placentas." -- Vin 7.14.6 "Station 44, Princeton-Hightstown Road, at the Mobil gas station... for an odor of gas. That's Station 44, at the Mobil gas station on Princeton-Hightstown road... for an odor of gas. It's going to be right near the gas attendant." -- WWPD fire dispatch 7.7.6 (01:23:51) milyehuang: dude, can I call you tom. night? (01:24:00) YoshisBabu: sure (01:24:05) YoshisBabu: is something up, are you ok? (01:24:06) milyehuang: I would stay and talk, but I just spent an hr talking online, and I should really sleep (01:24:19) milyehuang: nothing up-- just want to talk, but not now! (01:24:28) YoshisBabu: ohhh ok, sounds good, i'll hear from you whenever then (01:24:33) milyehuang: (therefore putting off to tomorrow) (01:24:43) YoshisBabu: ah, you're procrastinating me?! (... yes, in this depraved day and age, even friends can get procrastinated.) 6.13.6 Danielle: What are you doing? Steph: I'm pausing. How do you rewind this thing? Everyone Simultaneously: It's a DVD, Steph. 4.18.6 "It sucks when you have just one working light bulb in your apartment, and you have to unscrew it and screw it in in different rooms when you need to see. Oh, what? Normal people don't do that... my bad." -- Jacob 2.3.6 "You know where whale shit goes? It goes to the bottom of the ocean. Well, you're the thing the whale shit lands on." -- Tim Metzger 1.6.6 "You think that life is hard being a med student? Imagine being a lymphocyte. Your first exam as soon as you're born is Do You Bind To Self?-- and if you flunk, they take you out and shoot you." "A mast cell is like a land mine, sitting in tissue waiting for a parasite to come step on it." "One of the job descriptions of little kids is: you find a toy, you put it in your mouth, and then you give it to your buddy." -- Dr. Newlon 1.5.6 "The average microbe entering the body is the equivalent of a person covering himself with hamburger and jumping into a shark tank." "The epithelium is designed to restrict entry to microbes... but of course, one thing medicine is really good at is poking holes in people's epidermis." "Antibody-mediated neurtalization is sort of the molecular equivalent of being tarred and feathered." -- Dr. Newlon, Immunology 12.13.5 "Can I just give you a call on 911 to test it out?" -- Donald to dispatch 10.26.5 "I wanna do a man right now. I've been looking at women all night!" -- Blair 10.9.5 Emily: "Can you guess what is the most commonly aspirated object?" Donald: "Air?" 10.7.5 "If we all drank collagenase we'd be in sort of a slime all over the floor here." -- Dr. Wilson 10.6.5 "During embryological development, your testes start out near your kidneys. But my testes sure aren't anywhere near my kidneys. I checked this morning--you can take my word for it." -- Dr. Seiden 10.5.5 "Well, I think you and your big pet dog maybe will have lots of little pet rabbits." -- Donald 7.31.5 "My shoes don't come on so easily. Like many other things, they don't seem to like coming near me very much." -- Alex 7.24.5 "Can we have all the tall people in the back, and all the short people and my son in the front?" -- Sasha's Mom 7.20.5 "That's my dark secret. You know... back when I was five, a lossy compression algorithm killed my family." -- Hofmann Emily: "Do you still have your brain?" Ryan: "Oh no, I got it taken out." Emily: "Oh wow, I didn't even know that! How long ago was it?" Ryan: "It was a while ago... about 2 years already." 7.12.5 psoup31: sorry, but you can only stand so much ice cream when it tastes like pus 6.30.5 "Your shirt is pretty today. So bright, and colorful, and happy... the contrast with your face is just incredible." -- Alex 6.28.5 Emily: If this scone is no good, I will find whoever made it and exact my revenge! Eitan: Sometimes it's worse if you approximate it, actually. 5.25.5 "Wait, are you trying to think of something as good as an innocent person getting killed?" -- Lev 5.23.5 Emily: I, me, you, you, he, him, she, her... stupid irregular declensions! Darren: I love it when you talk dirty 4.26.5 "Well, you see, 'Women' is a very vague term." -- Prof. Lu 3.30.5 Julia: I'm stronger than you. Ryan: But I'm more annoying than you! 3.11.5 (EMT's on sleeping together...) "Carlyn, you know I don't like garlic. Later on when we're in bed, that garlic's really gonna bother me." -- Bob (while Carlyn on phone with her boyfriend) "I forgot I can't sleep with Carlyn, because she likes it roasting hot and I like it freezing cold." -- Bob 3.4.5 A duo taken entirely out of context: "But I've been asking for it all night!" -- Donald "Should I do this with you next to me?" -- Ross 1.3.5 milyehuang: as those schooled in the art know, the only proper way to eat a pint of raspberries is inhalation. MATHMAN825: Sure...right now it's an art while you're still dealing with smaller fruits...but don't say I didn't warn you when it's 2 years down the line and you're taking in a crate of tangerines intravenously. 10.18.4 Mel: "oh, they just scored a touchdown and we couldn't see because the marching band was in the way!" Carl: "You might say we were "band" from seeing it, haha!" Carl: "or that they "orchestrated" a touchdown..." Carl: "and watch out or they might "drum" out another one..." 10.11.4 "Wake me up when I'm done reading." -- Darren "I don't think you really like tea. You just like to torture poor teabags by dunking them in scalding water." -- Darren again 9.29.4 "I know you guys are students... but surely you can swing a better umbrella than that?" -- Cool Guy the Bus Driver (because Darren and I were using an umbrella we got in Chinatown for $1.50 (and this was after I bargained it down from $3), of which the protective "umbrella" part remained attached to only four of the eight spokes) 9.24.4 "For the reason that I was beset by fools and knaves." -- Donald on why he had a crap day 9.23.4 "But you don't understand. You see, I am actually incompetent." -- Prof. Katz on being taught to juggle Darren: But I can't be cute! I have facial hair. Nicole: Aww... just like a cute little bunny has facial hair. 9.18.4 "I was sitting in the back of the pickup truck with this piano tied down with two clotheslines, and we went around that little bend with the dip in the road on route 18 near the racetrack, and the next thing you knew, the piano had gone clear over the side of the truck and there was just this big SPROING!! and the piano was all over route 18! And then my father was asking me what I'd done to the piano." -- Carl, a story from his childhood 9.16.4 "Oh shit, it's Rosh Hashanah, isn't it?" -- Overheard in Palmer Square 9.10.4 "We can all go over to that 'Lick-Me' place for an ice cream afterwards." -- Donald, referring to the 'Lick-It' ice cream place 9.9.4 "You can think of them as sort of hobbled or crippled Turing machines." -- NP on FSA's 7.8.4 "You look nice. Not skinny." -- Garga to his roommate's girlfriend, who happens to be on the Atkins diet 6.23.4 PYu (upon me explaining the duties of an EMT): So you ride around in your EMT car, I mean, van, I mean, what is it called again? M: An ambulance, dear. It's called an ambulance. 3.9.4 "One time, we thought we had a house fire, and they found out the smoke was because my dad had left his socks in the oven. He was "drying" them." -- Aileen 2.29.4 "Keep the stuff off your skin, or you will itch forever." -- my chem lab book 2.28.4 PaleoJosh: plus which the waiter was a big lousy prick... PaleoJosh: all i tipped him was a fart, but it probably cleared by the time he got back to our table anyway 2.4.4 "If you put those reactants together at room temperature, they'll just laugh at you." -- Henry Gingrich 1.4 whizaway: pooper milyehuang: pooper? milyehuang: why pooper? whizaway: it's a term of endearment, don't worry :-) 12.31.3 "I have a vague notion of it, yes, but I don't know exactly what a problem set entails." -- Francis (he's a music major) Auto response from FunnyLabCoatGuy: If cellos are hottness amplifiers, does that make them infrared telescopes? 12.25.3 Lev is very funny... milyehuang: he just went off on a tangent about julia Lrey48: on a tangent? Lrey48: was your conversation circular when u happened to mention julias name Lrey48: and he just kept on going w/ the julia theme instead of continuing in the cicle? Lrey48: or was your conversation on some other function Lrey48: maybe you were talking about julia the whole time Lrey48: and the tangent to a line is the line itself Lrey48: and you just made it seem he switched topics Lrey48: ok - im a big dork --- Lrey48: or you can ask rpeterso Lrey48: he knows all this stuff by heart becuase he is a big dork milyehuang: heehee milyehuang: when you start referring to your friends by their netid's you know _you're_ a big dork 11.26.3 "Turns out that the problem is NP complete. Which is not a surprise, since everything you want to do is NP complete." -- Rob Schapire 11.25.3 "When I was little, I compared my mother to a tigress when she was angry, and to a sweet bean pastry when she was in a good mood." -- My Illustrious Father 11.24.3 "It works for H2O doped with a little acid." -- Maitland Jones 11.21.3 "Don't you people have a _home_??" -- John of Halo Pub Fame "We're closed on Thanksgiving, by the way." -- Same John John, how could you _do_ this to me?!?!? 11.20.3 PaleoJosh: isn't it kind of funny that rachmaninoff wrote lots of piano music, but there's all kinds of fortissississimo in his music milyehuang: what's funny about it? PaleoJosh: well, that it's called "piano music" 11.19.3 "I got up this morning and I stretched and looked out the window and looked down at my boobs, and I thought, 'well, I feel good today!' " --Aileen 11.13.3 "I just told you a lot more than I know about this..." -- Doug Clark milyehuang: mmm.... 2-Methoxybenzaldehyde... digeist: yep digeist: that's just what i was thinking 11.10.3 "I didn't put on my glasses, so I can't see what you're saying." -- my Dad 10.29.3 "i need a good solver. and vanilla sucks. i need a chocolate satsolver." -- Lev, on implementing WalkSat 10.17.3 "What we lack in brains, we make up for in lack of brains!" -- Richard whizaway: huanglo! milyehuang: weiss up! 5.10.3 "Do you ever dream in C?" --Indu 5.8.3 These were too good to resist. "I'm going through a red light. Hold on a second." --Aileen's aunt, on the phone. "Because it's extreme and new age, man! How can you be Asian and extreme without eating tofu, man!" --Francis Francis: (upon hearing that I'm working on DNA computation over the summer) So umm... DNA lab... are you making babies? Emily: No. Computers. milyehuang: I am writing a computer simulation of the DNA computers, which is ironically recursive. PaleoJosh: that sounds weird PaleoJosh: i learned just regular cursive, but i don't even use it anymore 5.4.3 On Mike's guitar jury woes: Emily: niceness ... guitar makes men sexy The response: Mike: You wouldn't say so if you were there ... I think I actually hurt the judges 4.30.3 "You don't even understand how much software there is that keeps you from dying!" "Let's say, in hypothetical language 'D'..." --Funkhouser 4.28.3 "y'know, I'm really glad I don't do drugs." "I wish I were Radiohead. Lansky would definitely give me an A." --Indu 4.26.3 John: I gotta go. I have to pick someone up for dinner in 20 minutes. Darren: Is (s)he heavy? John: Yeah. I have to go start working out. 4.22.3 Lev: Are you dead yet? Ryan: Yeah. Lev: As of when? Ryan: Yesterday morning at 10 o'clock. Lev: How? Ryan: I got shot. Lev: Where? Ryan: In the back. But I was wearing my sweatshirt, so maybe I didn't notice. 4.20.3 "New Jersey weather is like regular weather... on crack." --Nick Mantou 4.19.3 David D: "Wild Emily." Emily: I'm a "wild type." David D: Wild type?? You're about as mutated as they come. 4.17.3 I went home, and this is what my brother had to say: "Hey Emily, do you want to shoot my gun? It'll make you feel better." "Hey Emily, I'll give you 20 bucks if you are willing to start from the swing set and sprint as fast as you can to the shed, and let me shoot you." (The gun referred to above is a paintball gun, don't worry.) 4.16.3 M: my schedule is mostly red right now. D: If you published it, it would be re(a)d even more! M: I'm feeling kind of useless. D: You can be a paperweight! M: OK! 4.15.3 "Well i was never a big believer in underestimating chemicals." --Mike Schreck milyehuang: I'll be your KNIGHT IN SHINING LATIN! GodsDuck: but GodsDuck: but GodsDuck: but babes can't be knights 4.13.3 DanPeng1: picasso? DanPeng1: he had no Monet to buy degas to make the van gogh. 4.12.3 "...and he wore Abeecromber all the time." --Julia R. (ROCKS!) 4.4.3 "I was reading the dictionary for fun one day when I stumbled across this..." "Dan, stop smothering Emily." --Willie "The tires are the things on your car that make contact with the road The car is the thing on the road that takes you back to your abode" --Phish 3.27.3 Lev: When you eat ice cream, is one of your worries if you'll get cavities? Because I worry more about like, diabetes. Don: No, actually, I look at eating sweets as time to put your cares behind you and kick back... and forget about diabetes. You should turn off your worries when you eat ice cream. Ryan: ... and turn your tastebuds on! 3.10.3 "Could you please make the ice cream to milk ratio high?" --I was at a loss for how to explain to the Halo Pub guy that I wanted loooooots of ice cream in my milk float. 3.9.3 "THANK YOU all again and again for the only birthday celebration that could ever have overwhelmed the trauma of reaching 21." --Wen 3.6.3 (oh dear...) "guess what emily just said to me! i'm listening to beethoven's 2nd symphony and she said, "you listening to that mozart shit again?" hahahaha. now she's hiding her head under the blanket in shame." --Ryan 3.5.3 "I was trying to convolve Rage Against the Machine with Vanessa Mae, and it was really weird!" -- Indu 3.4.3 milyehuang: I was reading a pretty cool essay about "philosophy: who needs it" the other day. it was pretty cool milyehuang: and I am redundant redundant Mjshocker2: haha.... I noticed that you were redundant, and said the same thing twice 2.26.3 "Em is like, Sarah McLachlan can go fall in love. I'll take my ice cream." -- Aileen 2.21.3 "A telemarketer called me earlier today, about this 50,000 dollar sweepstakes, so I said I don't want 50,000 dollars, and she was really surprised, like why don't you want 50,000 dollars? So I told her that my chances in winning this sweepstakes are actually about 1 in a million and therefore the expected value of this sweepstakes to me is a nickel and I'm sorry I just don't have time for that." -- Dan (Ahn) 2.19.3 "If I wanted you to memorize random unrelated factoids, I'd just call this Biology." -- Prof. McLendon 2.18.3 "I call it 'defensive programming'. " "If you're lucky, you'll get a seg fault. That's the best thing that could happen." -- Bob Dondero, taken totally out of context 2.13.3 Lev: I work Saturday mornings. It's really nice. Em: Wow, Saturday mornings? When? Lev: Oh, like 12 to 4 pm 2.11.3 Em: I'd like to take a look at the wines. Nic says he has some nice port. Sasha: You've got a nice starboard. But what I really want to do is tap your aft. (aww isn't he cute. and if anyone else besides sasha tries that he's gonna get his ass kicked) 2.10.3 "I was just thinking about how I love the snow... and snow is the greatest invention ever, of mankind... and then I realized that it's more like--" "--the greatest invention ever, of God-kind?" -- David "Bond" Chen and Lev 2.8.3 Em: Darren, you are so retarded. Darren: aww, thanks Em 2.7.3 "I know that sometimes I say things uncomfortably close to the truth, but seriously..." -- Aileen 2.4.3 "Complete bipartite graphs are not complete. It's like plastic ducks are not ducks, alright?" -- Prof. Seymour 1.15.3 "Then when you dream you'll realize that you're flying to london. And there is a paper somewhere that says you're staying in a hotel room with Lev. And you'll wake up in shock and panic, about how your dream could have come true." -- Lev 1.12.3 "honestly, i never woulda thought i'd spend time on aim being hit on by a total math weirdo" -- Aileen 1.11.3 very early in the morning Em (waking up from a sleepy stupor on the futon): Aww you started the movie! I wanted to see that movie too! Aileen: See! She's doing it! I told you. She always does this, she's actually asleep, and she kind of gets up in the middle and says something and then collapses again. Lev: wow that's so weird Em: I am NOT asleep! I am awake! Aileen: See, and she _thinks_ she's awake too (half an hour later they're still not convinced I'm awake) 1.9.3 "Ooh, this is cool! I almost extracted my eye." -- Indu, taken completely out of context 1.5.3 "But maybe with L&O it's also that I have a thing for Sam Watterson." -- Dave 12.9.2 milyehuang: oh deardeardear GodsDuck: yes honeyhoneyhoney? milyehuang: the world is beeeeeautifulbeautifulbeautiful. lalalaaaaaaaaaa milyehuang: and no, *crossly* I am NOT in love GodsDuck: i like old friends GodsDuck: they can hold up both sides of the argument 12.5.2 "i tend to be illogical at night.. when I was on the top bunk at Interlochen and my blanket fell off, I didn't realize I could get off the bed to pick it up; I kept trying to reach down" -- Dave Spielberg 12.4.2 "He moves those octaves down like he's hauling a refrigerator down 2 flights of stairs or something." "One of the Best Things about getting sick is getting better! especially since suffering is so important to Beethoven." "That first section has given us everything except the kitchen sink! We've had the fugue, we've stood before God, we've marched Turkishly..." "Just imagine if Beethoven were in your MUS 106 class. And you're up next. Time to P/D/F." -- Prof. Burnham 11.17.2 milyehuang: I should actually go code right now. and maybe life will work out. normalnii: exit(1);? milyehuang: yup. exit(1); normalnii: heh. normalnii: ok normalnii: kernel_panic(TRUE); milyehuang: awww...poor baby milyehuang: seriously dimah milyehuang: you just made me burst out laughing milyehuang: the whole hall heard normalnii: :-) great ! normalnii: niceness youre perfect for the next cs convert! normalnii: bwahahahahahahhahahahhaha milyehuang: arrgh normalnii: do you mean argv? heh heh milyehuang: no I meant argc milyehuang: ;-) normalnii: heh heh heh normalnii: h a ha ha normalnii: still laffing normalnii: hah ahah normalnii: :-) 10.24.2 "How much BS could a BSE guess if a BSE could BS?" -- Dave 10.16.2 "I used to have a Scottish drinking buddy with whom I'd sit up and drink 'til the sunrise, and every time the sun rose he would say, 'Glory be! -- on time again.' " -- Prof. Brown Ryan (agreeing with something I said): "word!" Emily: "word.c happens to be the name of my program..." Ryan: "search, yo!" Emily: "word up!" Ryan: "word diagonal!" 10.9.2 Lev: "How's CS going?" Emily: "Arrgh! I keep getting a seg fault." Lev: "Oh no... you are tracing a null pointer. Cut that shit out!" 10.7.2 digeist: virgin births with me as the daddy, cool beans 10.6.2 Emily: "Mahler isn't exactly conducive to homework. It's more conducive to..." Alex: "Suicide?" *jumps out window* 10.2.2 "It's like, a-flat minor, party of seven... your victim is ready..." -- Burnham, on the Funeral March from Beethoven Op. 26 9.19.2 "You can never have enough of quicksort! That would be like if someone asked you if you'd like some chocolate ice cream and you said, No thanks, I've had that before" "We're going to do a bit of math. Let's suffer together, okay?" -- Prof. Chazelle Chazelle: "Will they just shut up out there?" Student: "Do you want me to close the door?" Chazelle: "Well, if you could just go out there and shoot some of them that would be great." John: "Do you have anything to say to Juliet in the window?" Dave: "I forgot my Shakespeare." 6.12.2 "I did have windows in that office!! They were on my computer!" -- My dad, on the lack of windows in every office he's ever had at work 5.19.2 "The bird pooped on my bed!" -- Me, to Spielberg, after the bird pooped on my bed. "my dad's a NATURAL breadwinner." -- Me 5.14.2 after 2 hours of sleep, this is what I had to say about Latin in the morning: "Arma virumque cano...Trojae qui primus ad... shit." "I say 'B', you say 'S'! B: (S!) B: (S!) BS!!!!!!!! Five hours to dean's date..." -- John Jameson's away message "You see, my actual paper's only two pages. The rest of it is derailment." -- John Jameson 5.13.2 "If you feel like I haven't been in touch with you, don't feel left out or anything-- I haven't in touch with anyone lately, including meals." -- Francis Emily: "Do you want to see what I do when I'm psychotic?" Dan: "No." "This whole thing is like... a Korean superleech." -- Dan "Prepare your bowels for immediate release!" -- Dan "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!! Both papers not sufficiently long! BS=max. Must engage BS hyperdrive! go into...hyperpoop!" -- John Jameson 5.12.2 Emily: "So can I borrow the SUV to drive up to High Point when we go camping?" Mother: "That's really far. No. I don't trust you." Emily: "You do realise that if I'm not driving, then one of my friends is... you mean to say that you trust one of my friends to drive a carful of college-kids to High Point over me?" Mother: "Yep." "oops! that was a No Turn on Red," -- My father, while turning on red) Explaining the threefold existence of God: Sasha: "God is like Superman. you know, he has the clark kent personna and then he's also Superman." Aileen: "God is like Superman? That's the worst metaphor I've ever heard." Lev: "That's a simile." Sasha: "A simile is a metaphor. And they're all analogies... and that's what I think." Aileen: "Sasha, put your diction away." Sasha: "My diction's getting whipped out everywhere." Aileen: "Emily doesn't want to see your diction, okay?" 5.11.2 "I tried sleeping in every position--curled up in a ball, stretched out, upside down, inside out... Nothing worked!" -- Spielberg 5.10.2 webblue: i love cute things because i'm sorta a girl (dont' tell anyone) milyehuang: dude, that's going up in my quotery webblue: oh NO webblue: then EVERYONE will find out milyehuang: ROFL. so? webblue: ok fine webblue: i'm not ashamed of my sexuality webblue: woops that was another one, eh? 5.6.2 "Well, I have an astronomical gastronomical expansion." -- Wen 5.5.2 "You'll be fine. Unless you explode." -- Spielberg, on my eating an entire pint of Haagen Dazs ice cream 5.4.2 In the dining hall... Emily: "Why is this called pan-asian-orange chicken? Darren: "Because it was made in a pan!" Dave: "Because it was made out of asian!" Emily: "EEW--shit!" 5.3.2 ...I need to stop being an idiot. milyehuang: ryan webblue: emily milyehuang: it's time for a STUDY PARTY webblue: oh milyehuang: ryan milyehuang: ryan milyehuang: ryan milyehuang: ryab milyehuang: oops milyehuang: I wanted to go to sleep at about 12:45. I wanted to study some math first milyehuang: I sat on my bed with the math book, fell asleep. woke up at 4:30 all the lights were still on milyehuang: I had the math book on top of me : ( webblue: aw that's so cute webblue: haha 5.2.2 An element of sarcasm: dspiel: how much cake do u have left? milyehuang: a few slices do you want some? I have to feed my mother first, though dspiel: hmmm, fair enough...she did give birth to you afterall. dspiel: and raised you. dspiel: and watched you grow into a beautiful young woman. *sniff* dspiel: -le. sniffle milyehuang: ROFL 4.27.2 "Wow, that Stravinsky really played with my mind. I mean, it was supposed to be this huge sacrifice, but at the end, I felt like I was being sacrificed!" -- Josh Burton on The Rite of Spring "I kind of lost touch with Emily her senior year of high school. The last time I saw her, I asked her if she was going to come to Princeton. The response was something like, 'Over my dead body!!!' The next time I made contact with her, it was 3 weeks into the semester on campus and I heard 'Jameson??' turned around, saw an Emily, and became totally confused..." -- John to prefrosh about coming to Princeton 4.20.2 "It would be quite a boring world if everyone only said exactly what he meant all the time. Literature would be nonexistent, for one." -- Gowers DSpiel: So far my only visits have been a prospective student, a prospective applicant, and a bisexual. Which makes one think of the song "One of these things is not like the other." 4.18.2 "Don't break these. Because if you break them, then Ryan breaks me." -- Spielberg, upon lending me the bongos 4.17.2 A letter from Dave: Em, Your father gets arrested tomorrow. Just thought it'd be nice to drop a quick reminder just in case. :) See you this eve, Dave And later... dspiel: mazel tov to your father on avoiding arrest! fun with away messages: milyehuang : sasha, will you marry me? Auto response from SashaMDUS: Umm, yeah. milyehuang : YES! SashaMDUS: F**k. Not again. 4.10.2 "Working hard, hardly working, whatever..." -- Mike Schreck Mjshocker2: of course, I would never leave math.... milyehuang: I'm glad you kept the math Mjshocker2: I <3 math. naturally milyehuang: I was worried for its saftey Mjshocker2: oh no... I take care of my math... "yeah that's right, math is like food....you must have it to sustain yourself" -- Schreck 4.9.2 humanityIsDoomed: how can they not use UNIX in 126? humanityIsDoomed: learning C without UNIX is like learning how to paint without brushes! 4.5.2 Dan: "What can't you make with origami?" Lev: "Bigger paper?" 4.4.2 ZeussMarie: hey ZeussMarie: i hear you wanna be screwed? milyehuang: no, I don't want gto be screwed milyehuang: if someone wants to screw me, and has a "good idea" for doing so, it's fine by me, that's all I said "Where's the chalk? You know, if I were chalk, I'm not sure I'd like to be destroyed on the chalkboard, either. I mean, how would you like to have your body rubbed against the blackboard until you're scraped away... Anyway, now that we've shared that, we can get back to math..." -- Prof. Hagelstein 4.2.2 Mjshocker2 (3:17:11 AM): everybody knows math majors are the most electrifying people around 3.31.2 Emily: "Darren, your charm is showing!" Chrissy (after long scrutiny): "Where is his charm? I don't see it." 3.30.2 "Why did my parents raise me to be just stubborn enough to never ask for help? Maybe it's an Asian thing. -- Francis "The world as a whole is like a Rubix cube. Each time you try to change something, many other things change with it. If you want to change thing for the better, change carefully, and change extensively. -inspired by Rubix-mistress Emily Huang" -- Charles Tao : ) 3.28.2 oatyhon: You are not Emily. What did you lose? If you lost something then you're a loser, but it's only temporary. You just have to go find it now. Good luck on the search! Enjoy the spring sunshine today! :-) Auto response from milyehuang (1:12:06 PM): I'm a loser. 3.28.2 "There's a reason that the word 'analysis' begins with the word 'anal.' " -- SuperDan 3.27.2 milyehuang: He's tall milyehuang: and blond Wuffy2001: Do you know him?? milyehuang: I've got a new allusion to 'Death by Water'. "DEATH BY MATH!!!" AngularJerk: hehe... just think... Emily the Chinese, a fortnight dead, forgot the Integral of Sine, and the good kernels AngularJerk: and dirichelet and poisson.... "What's that? oh-- a parking violation. Yeah. I didn't pay it before, and now if I don't pay it before april 10th or something, they'll come and arrest my dad. HAHAHAAA!!" -- Me, to Spielberg 3.26.2 "I have a Sasha butt on my head!" --Me, in Blair study room Emily: "Sasha, you can sit here." Lev:"Oh, can I pet him?" "Landau is an angel sent to us by the greatest physicist of all!" -- Nic (apparently ripped off from Dan) 3.25.2 "OOh! Your charm is showing!" -- Aileen to Darren 3.17.2 Father: "So, what do we want to eat... (examines label on bag of frozen dumplings) pork and vegetable dumplings or... (examines another bag) ... vegetable and pork--" Emily: "Waitaminute--those are the same!" 3.12.2 "Now this is an absolutely cute proof that you can all go and impress your friends with at lunch today." -- Prof. Hagelstein Nic: "Where's the fuzzy rabbit book?" Don: "Oh, it's over on the ledge right between Bertrand Russell and Poe." 3.11.2 "I'm never non-prurient." -- Me, on being alone in a room with a boy SuperDan (after explaining a math concept): "That was so anticlimactic: I was expecting an excited Ohhhhh!!!!! of understanding!" Emily: "Ohhhhhhh!!!!!!" 3.8.2 "Whoa!" --Hagelstein, as he stumbled backwards into a chair while explaining a proof "So if there's ANY justice in the world, the integral of that function's going to have to be zero." -- Prof. Hagelstein Emily: "Well, I can't do crack any more because of that one day, when I had a lot of crack, and then I threw up... I have bad memories of crack coming up the other way." Indu: "Wow, I hope you get over it: it's not good to be off crack." 3.7.2 Emily: "I don't just DO crack. I steal it." Scott: "Ah, you got off desserts so now you need something stronger, I see." "I know. I did this last year, just fine. I don't know what I was thinking, but..." -- Prof. Clark, on simulating TOY "DUDE. This stuff is just SO exciting and... stimulating!" --Dave on TOY. ---------------------------------------- It's time to start putting dates on quotes. ---------------------------------------- "Dude. How am I going to get rid of this stupid cosine?" --Em doing math at home... "Erase it." --my mother "Stop pointing that knife at me. I have this thing about dying..." -- Alex McD Why the Klezmocrats are the Klezmocrats: "Well, we were thinking of Princeton University Klezmer Ensemble, but that's PUKE and while a couple of people really like that name, we decided that it was generally not a good idea to go around as PUKE." *em breaks into hysterical laughter* "hmm. I think you're just laughing on cue. PUKE." *hysterical laughter* "Alright. I'm not going to laugh at PUKE anymore." "So anyway, after we decided not to be... PUKE--" *more hysterical laughter* ... excerpted from conversation with David Spielberg "We're just trying to scare the willies out of you by messing this data up really badly." -- Professor Norm, physics 210, on error analysis. Of course, he says this to a class that includes a Willie in it. "Are you kidding Emily? Frozen yogurt is Breakfast food! How can you even think of it as a dessert! (Just don't have frozen yogurt with sprinkles, especially the rainbow kind, since that's way too much fun and should obviously count as dessert.)" -- Jessi Waite In astro 401. Prof. Bahcall: "If someone asks you, 'How many galaxies are in the Universe?' what do you say?" Student: "A lot?" FunnyLabCoatGuy (1:17:16 PM): btw, I wish I was as surrounded with science and math people as you- too many of the people here are either humanities people or "science-lite" people (this after he read the below quote:) "What time is it now, in base seven?" -- Matt to willie at dinner. (I don't know about you, but MY friends are all incredibly talented and uhh... smart) Willie: What's Astro 401 about again? Nic: uhm, well it's called Galaxies, Quasars, and what's that other thing. Em: The Universe, Nic. The Universe. DUDE. Phillip's Philosophical Rendition of Life: What is the meaning of life? To search for truth and beauty. To ask questions. To find the answer to this question To rigorously mathematically prove by epislon-delta treatment that this question has no answer. Proof? For all oranges greater than zero, there exists a banana such that for all fruits tastier than the banana, an orange sweeter than a banana implies the orange is yellow. So by the Jedi-Schwartz Inequality, all oranges are not orange. This leads to an obvious contradiction. " It's too bad life is a departmental requirement, otherwise I'd P/D/F it." -- Phill Wei "Is this a pi? I don't even recognize my own pi's anymore. Wait-- there shouldn't be a pi there at all!" -- Professor Nappi emily: I hope I don't squish you head. willie: It's okay. Wait a minute. It's not okay... Where there's a Will, there's a Wai (-Yeung Wong) --Willie's improvement on the ol' saying "Alright. Time to go see Steven Spielberg." -- David Spielberg "dammit... I missed!" -- Willie drew a set of x-y coordinate axes on a piece of paper, then tried to draw in the z axis, but failed to make it through the origin... "Please pass the NaCl?" -- Dave Spielberg "I think it's time to drop out." "Come on! I'm trying to get an education." -- Fred Liu "It's all Latin to me." --john jameson, on Cicero "So, at the end of the day, what Hamilton's equations tell us is that the important things in life are not q and q-dot, as we had previously assumed, but q and p." -- Prof. Nappi "So why do we care about Lagrangians? well, for starters, they're really good for impressing non physicists." -- Peter Ouyang "This picture of a hot early stage of the universe was first put forward by the scientist George Gamow in a famous paper written in 1948 with a student of his, Raph Alpher. Gamow had quite a sense of humor--he persuaded the nuclear scientist Hans Bethe to add his name to the paper, to make the list of authors "Alpher, Bethe, Gamow," like the first three letters of the Greek alphabet, alpha, beta, gamma: particularly appropriate for a paper on the beginning of the universe." --Stephen Hawking, A Brief History of Time "I turn away with fright and horror from the lamentable evil of functions which do not have derivatives." --Charles Hermite Vector Calculus, by Jerrold Marsden and Anthony Tromba, has the following wisdom to offer: "Definition: Velocity Vector If c is a path and it is differentiable, we say c is a differentiable path." really? i never knew.